Page 2 - Testimonials :

Iustina Cojocaru (Translator of the book )“Love is probably one of the most thought through described concept in the history of mankind and certainly of art-making. The creativity or creation that it is in the field of both art and thought meets necessarily the love and its wrapping up nostalgia. Its unique fascination attached to the word is due to the manifold aspects of mirroring such a deep feeling mankind has had the inclination to develop in a rich semantic reference marked by the energy, richness it is spread, condenses and breaks down endlessly. This fascinating book is displaying a full register of sides love may embody eternally and humanely by revealing many characters playing the role of the lover who cannot be reached and fulfill the insatiable longing for the ideal partner.


         Two halves in search to meet or ”recognize” each other in order to fulfill the dreamt of whole. Throughout a gifted displaying of letters addressed to them all she has come across on her path in life the feminine half and talented author is looking for him throughout the world and amongst many other relationships, resulting in an unspoiled beauty of words lace works – eventually we are faced with a philosophical dilemma.


           Melancholy, an endless longing for the missing image in the mirror, a disclosed narcissistic quest is leading us towards o profound yet common leitmotiv of defeat – the self goes in search of its missing half and meanwhile it is painfully suffering an imminent loss. The response is the same as that in Freud analysis in his masterpiece, Mourning and Melancholia, brimming her feelings over the missing dreamt of beloved man, while meeting her insatiable desire to meet him by exposing herself sensually undressed, stripped off, so in her mood of showing up naked – metaphor of the nudity and purity of unfulfilled love even though there is always an option for promise by many choices of partners, characters, either male, or female, who are ”not enough” – in other words, not meant to be that desired You – to bridge the gap between her writing and the written one, the missing half she is longing for the prime union as the androgynous myth; under the spur of a damage of not being able to find him she is deceived ”How come you are my mirror?”, she asked to her pretended astonishment – and the turmoil of emotions echoes the primordial concept of the ”looking-glass self” that is the foundation for imagining your self-image, the unity into All. Here  the humans social relationship is the prototypical bond between a nurturing being – the seeker/writer and an imaginary, vulnerable entity, the written one who is mirroring himself into many other persons.


           Through empathy or mirroring, we imagine the perspective of others, enhancing our capacity to invent, to picture other and these images are our only window into the minds of humans: ”dear G.,...You turned me from Ana into Not-being-Ana”, so the young author of this bolding enterprise is coping with her own vulnerabilities she is sharing to us as she experiences the not-to-be-loved mood.” Thus the ego is invested with a projected wish of achieving the union and becoming one and the same with her own love in order to attain the well-being, the psychological comfort it is in this duality that lies the permanent pursuit of happiness and the book points out exactly this path towards achieving its supreme goal by exploring and maintaining vivid the dangerous relationships” settled between non-existence/appearance and sexuality. The process of purification and knowledge or reaching so many beautiful insights with any new love affair, both real and imaginary, shatters the option of non-existence and strengthens the sexual side, in a feminine an gracious imagery, with lace, pearls, high heels and sensual curling hair. The sadness of the melancholic story-teller is misleading as Eros succeeds to substitute the ego and the object of the quest which becomes a sound support for life. The means to meet this end is simply writing, writing down her thoughts and projected tales about searching on the lover’s skin, on the white page of their love story, a potential source of endless creativity: ”I am the child who was born out of a letters exchange love”, so I was meant to write.” The need to create is a reparatory process useful for healing any wound. It is the most powerful spring or power resource we possess as humans. To create means to heal the loved object, formerly destroyed and lost, to restore it/Him as symbol, epitome of the pursuit, to ensure a certain long-standing and certitude. Through the act of creation the author reaches to the catharsis-like projection outwardly.


           Rising throughout the pages of the book the recurrent question where is to be find that mysterious He, the author is sharing us her attempts to live beyond time confinement as her art – the writing of this looking-for-love – is beside time and space it is a kind of identification with an ideal, a means of becoming him through this mirroring so that finally, the answer is wrapping us up in a disclosing truth – is it You? – the inevitable question being: Or rather is it Me? – thus, creation becomes an act of healing and restoring the integrity of being by turning towards the inner world to discover the real self which is looking for the missing half. The act of writing is transfiguration, a metaphor of life endlessly anew and regenerating itself through creation. The novelty of each new quest, a new letter addressed to a new character brings about through returning to the mirror reflecting the self awaiting to achieve the fusion, turning into the fantasy of the origin, the gist, hence the importance of the primordial scene of the finding as present as in each creator endless whirlwind of finding answers.


           The author expresses a wide range of feelings so common to all of us – once we have enough, it can happen to feel the urge of wanting more, to get bored at what we have and going on search of a new partner, no more contentment but rather a sense of emptiness which complicates life and heighten our status anxiety, which fuels our own sense of relative deprivation. And as the sociologist Randall Collins explains, we don’t seek physical and material comforts, we also desire a need for ”emotional energy”, which is greater than any yearning for sex or money as if we lack a sense of moral goodness then we won’t enjoy pleasures and beauty of life. A self-idea has therefore three layers of manifestation – the imagination of her appearance to the other one, the beloved, the imagination of his judgment of her appearance and the permanent self-feeling, ways we imagine what is going on in the minds of others – the multifaceted He.


         I kindly invite you to discover a deep search of this tormented soul endlessly and beautifully carrying on finding her missing half. It is an epic search beyond time and social constraints as ”The time of our feeling is not the same as the time of the clocks” – as pointed out famously by the writer Salman Rushdie. The purpose of this book is to investigate the only important question for the searching self – Is there another You we are longing for and endlessly looking for to meet and complete the one we were meant to be?“

Ana Dragalina





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